Ups and downs, good days and bad are all part of living life. It won’t always be easy sailing. This doesn’t even take into account that catastrophe’s do happen in people’s lives. I’m simply talking about getting up and going about the same business you usually do, and just thinking and feeling, “Wow, this is a crappy day!” And you know what? It’s okay.

We aren’t always on top of our game. Take a look at any sports team and watch them, or the athletes, go through streaks and spells regularly. What I’ve noticed in the town I live is how hard the fans are on the team when they perform poorly, let alone for any length of time. With all that negative energy, I wonder how much more difficult it is to pull out of the slide?

Let’s face it; when having an off-day, recall the feeling brought on when criticism is aimed your way. Having the off-day, I’m already being tough on myself. That is a thinking problem getting in the way and exposing the wound even more – just waiting for someone to come along and stick a finger in. And when someone says something, the very words I’ve caught myself saying are reinforced and generate more negativity.

The days I’m more consciously together, I weather the bad day better. I ride the waves, my thoughts aren’t running wild, and I don’t let criticism have anything other than a positive effect – should I choose to entertain the criticism in the first place. That’s not running away from anything either, it’s simply recognizing where I’m at and creating the boundaries that respect that. Doing so also offers better opportunities in the future.

Believe me when I tell you, there is nothing worse than yammering at someone when your thoughts and feelings are getting the better of you. What disturbed me this week though, was something I heard from a seniors facility director: “As we get older we lose impulse control.” I didn’t quite know what she meant by that and asked for clarification.

When she interviews candidates wanting to work with seniors they are always asked, “What do you think of old people?” As soon as an answer, “They’re wonderful!” the interview is over. I was surprised to hear this and inquired further to learn that losing impulse control is about the tongue. Working with old people is very demanding and they can be surprisingly mean, with no curbing of the tongue, and no speed bumps to delivery. You have to know this going in, be prepared for it, and to understand where it comes from.

Impulse control… it may be clinically factual with the elderly, and yet something suggests it is equally evident among the general population and is also triggered by prolong periods of high-level stress. I have no fact, nor done any research to support this theory I’ve just stated. I call it a hunch, and looking at my runaway-mouth at times, I wonder. I smile as I say this, because a large part of what I’ve become is about authenticity.

I won’t say I always get it right, and even in that, I’m acknowledging this striving for authenticity. There are going to be days. Right? Being authentic and having intimate relationships are what I hear more people asking and demanding, while feeling an inability to be real. Talking with these like-minded people, it always links to a lot of belief systems that define what has become of our society, business ethic, political and world affairs.

There has been so much progress and striving for improvement, education, advancement, social status, wealth, and so on for generations. With so much focus on the winning, climbing, and achieving, I wonder if it is simply what I hear in the hints people suggest. “There isn’t enough time. I’m always exhausted. I hate my job. People are cold, or unavailable, or too busy.” The list goes on, I’m sure you’ve heard others. Doesn’t it all speak to a simple need to “relate” to one-another, to build intimate relationships, to experience community, and to know and be known?

The other day, I was reading the Meaning of Life wikipedia and found myself also eventually exploring The Hitchhikers Guide to The Galaxy wikipedia page for Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything. This is where the most advanced super-computer churns and churns to come up with the answer. When the answer “42″ is delivered, it leaves more questions than answers. This brings the supercomputer to suggest that they now need to discover the Ultimate Question.

As I read God’s Will and The Meaning of Life a day or so ago, the message again resonated deeply. It is about Love, it is about Joy, and like the people feeling the longing, it is affirmed in their want for intimacy, for authenticity, and in the desire to relate to other human beings. It has me wondering if we’re now at a time, along the journey of mankind, where we can make adjustments for the continued advancement of humankind, society, and see what else good comes from healthy choices.

I’m wondering if isn’t time for us to learn more about being human, beginning with ourselves, and then with others, and adjust culture to embrace our fullness. I found it weird this word fullness forced its’ way in here, and had to reflect on it. The a-ha came almost immediately, recognizing that humanity – you and I – and how we relate will be different. We will create our fullness through these empowering experiences.

I don’t usually share other people’s written material, particularly if it is already on the web. However, this particular article came to me via email, as I also subscribe to Jon’s great Newsletter. This particular list happened to arrive at a time when I, too, needed the encouragement it offered. It’s never that we’re handling a situation badly, so much as every little piece of encouragement is good and useful, empowering and strengthening us on our individual journeys.

20 Ways to Get Mentally Tough

(Excerpt from Training Camp: What the Best Do Better Than Everyone Else)

1. When you face a setback, think of it as a defining moment that will lead to a future accomplishment.
2. When you encounter adversity, remember, the best don’t just face adversity; they embrace it, knowing it’s not a dead end but a detour to something greater and better.
3. When you face negative people, know that the key to life is to stay positive in the face of negativity, not in the absence of it. After all, everyone will have to overcome negativity to define themselves and create their success.
4. When you face the naysayer’s, remember the people who believed in you and spoke positive words to you.
5. When you face critics, remember to tune them out and focus only on being the best you can be.
6. When you wake up in the morning, take a morning walk of gratitude and prayer. It will create a fertile mind ready for success.
7. When you fear, trust. Let your faith be greater than your doubt.
8. When you fail, find the lesson in it, and then recall a time when you have succeeded.
9. When you head into battle, visualize success.
10. When you are thinking about the past or worrying about the future, instead focus your energy on the present moment. The now is where your power is the greatest.
11. When you want to complain, instead identify a solution.
12. When your own self-doubt crowds your mind, weed it and replace it with positive thoughts and positive self-talk.
13. When you feel distracted, focus on your breathing, observe your surroundings, clear your mind, and get into The Zone. The Zone is not a random event. It can be created.
14. When you feel all is impossible, know that with God all things are possible.
15. When you feel alone, think of all the people who have helped you along the way and who love and support you now.
16. When you feel lost, pray for guidance.
17. When you are tired and drained, remember to never, never, never give up. Finish Strong in everything you do.
18. When you feel like you can’t do it, know that you can do all things through Him who gives you strength.
19. When you feel like your situation is beyond your control, pray and surrender. Focus on what you can control and let go of what you can’t.
20. When you’re in a high-pressure situation and the game is on the line, and everyone is watching you, remember to smile, have fun, and enjoy it. Life is short; you only live once. You have nothing to lose. Seize the moment.

In what ways will you choose to be mentally tough? Share your comments here.

20 Ways to Get Mentally Tough Poster

Download, Print and Share as a Reminder to Be Strong Each Day!

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Tama J. Kieves is a kindred spirit in the world of coaching. I often enjoy reading her email newsletters and this one received today is one of those rare beauties that I’m delighted to share with my readers.

Tama’s Musings reprinted with permission.

(Note: This was supposed to go out on Valentine’s Day, but we chose Divine Timing instead….)

A Love Letter from the Divine…

I want you to know that I love you very much. It doesn’t matter to me if you eat fudge ice cream in your vintage underwear in the middle of the night. And I think you’re precious, not following through on your Gratitude Journal yet, fourth year running. Beloved, I’m not the least bit concerned with those unsavoury thoughts about your ex. I am not limited to momentary facts. I know your shimmering nature. I know how AMAZING you are.

But if I’m honest, I am a little concerned about this. I wonder why you don’t trust the desires that have always been yours. You strive to ignore your wildest dreams because they feel so good, but I thought that surely you’d recognize their unrivalled power because they feel so good. Please know I supplied you with unstinting resources and a hunger strong enough to make any of your desires come true. And surely you’ve noticed a few of the lines I’ve written for you in some of the self-help books you’ve read. I keep putting those books out there and you even keep buying them. But, still, I find you sitting in the corner as though you are an orphan child, as though you’ve been abandoned without a key, a charm, a brand new GPS system and an entourage waiting just for you. I even hear you whisper, “I don’t know what to do.”

But I gave you a Free Pass. I gave you a Free Pass to the life that stirs your blood and strengthens your bones. Yes, of course there are challenges. But I thought you’d enjoy the thrill of the chase that way. I didn’t want to make it easy. I know your strength and capacity. I thought you’d find the deluxe wild ride entertaining. I didn’t think you’d ever believe that circumstances could stop you. You are unstoppable. You are branded with my love and with my infinite energy.  But here’s the thing. When you stop believing in your soul’s desires, you’ve stopped believing in me. When you give up on yourself, you don’t feel my Presence anymore. Now that just destroys me. I’ve sung to you from the radios and sent morning doves and dragon flies to mark your path. I’ve used your life coaches and therapists to tell you the truth. I whisper to you constantly. Sometimes I even press down on your heart or turn the flames up on your blood pressure. I’ll do anything dear one to reach you. I’ll never give up on you. I want you to know what you’re here for. I want you to stop denying what you know. Your doubt is poison. It is not protecting you.

Now I know that you think you will not be rewarded in the world for your singular expression, temperament, and abilities, but I tell you it is not true, dear one. You will know nothing but reward when you share your love. You will transform into another you, the real you, the one without limits, shame, fear or regrets. So dearest Beloved, I send you a thousand roses of Spirit and ten thousand dark chocolates of soul. I don’t want a tryst with you. I want the whole thing, the Grand Love Affair of watching you bloom and heal and let go of every false limitation you’ve ever believed about yourself or the rest of your shining world. These thoughts only make you tired. The truth would have you laughing and clapping and hugging every precious soul around you. I want you to burst through the density of this world with the power of your totality. I want you to know what it’s like to fully trust your love and not look over your shoulder. I want you to know I’ve got your back, your front, your sides, and your soul. I want you to honour your true desires because they are your arrows. And like Cupid, I’ve shot them through your heart. Cupid copied me by the way! Please know that whatever you choose–and whenever you choose it– you are loved and sustained in ways you can’t even fathom from your side of the veil. You are my Beloved and I’m always here for you.  Happy Valentine’s Day….everyday!

—Your Loving Universe

P.S. Stop watching the news so much. Your life is the news.

Tama

©Copyright 2008 Tama J. Kieves. All rights reserved.

Feel free to forward this copy to anyone you think might enjoy it.
Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. Thank you.

Want to discuss this or any other aspect of living your dreams? Please visit our free discussion forum.

Tama J. Kieves
www.AwakeningArtistry.com
The Art of Living Your Dreams

“If you’re this successful doing work you don’t love,
what could you do with work you do love?”

THIS TIME I DANCE!
Creating the Work You Love/
How One Harvard Lawyer Left It All to Have It All!

Tensions run high amidst people sometimes. Being a new body among established people’s relationships is a hairy ordeal. Tonight, a big realization came to light around a deep need that has been burning up my energy through tensions, stress, worries, suspicions, and fears. Normally, these would be manageable and not cause much problem; in this case, existing circumstances did a lot to add to the mess.

One person says something out of turn. It’s tone, delivery, and perceived intent is to warn not to trust someone. On the one hand, this might save from disaster, while on the other hand, this casts doubt on who to trust. This is bad medicine for any organization or team, and must be addressed decisively. Not to kill, martyr, or make examples. This is where the realization of what has really been troubling me suddenly revealed its’ source, value, and desire.

Base-brat growing up, a short military stint myself, and having lived pretty-much from one coast to another in some fashion or other, coming to new communities and trying to “connect” in social groups has been nothing short of painful. Social groups – you know – those little cliques we all had with our friends growing up. When we were with them we followed along, we teased, and sometimes bullied physically. I had to learn to fight back. I never liked it.   Still don’t.
Fighting back is a necessary skill in life. It is a skill that can be robbed of any child or youth – to some degree or another.  When a Father decks you for defending yourself, with the promise of more for any further fighting, you replace your fists with feet in running shoes. The tragedy here is that as an individual in this life, you no longer know who you can trust. The one you ought to trust didn’t protect, and also took away your only form of defence. The one’s chasing you, are ignorant to what they are doing, even though some will fight with a conscience.

I’m sharing this with you tonight because it is critically important to develop a good team. People need to be able to trust one another. I need to know you’ve got my back. You need to know I’ve got your back. When rumour, accusations, and ambiguity arise – particularly for any new staff – and there are no avenues of clear and safe conversation, the sense of safety and security in the new environment gets stretched thinner and thinner with every twist or phrase that could be taken out of context.

Create that lack of safety, create more highly-attuned-and-overly-sensitive people who are on high alert and jumping at every alarm. Having a teammate throw me to the wolves as a scapegoat, having heard a rumour, having circumstances and events create and add to that uncertainty has demonstrated this fact loud and clear. Create a team where everyone truly creates that safe place to screw up, fix up, contribute, speak up, ask dumb questions, and not get laughed at, and you’ll create a powerful and creative unit that can function at higher peaks of concentration, effectiveness, and efficiency.

The military and a few other groups I was privy to join demonstrated strong examples of safe teams and leaders as described. Equally, I’ve experienced the opposite spectrum and some in-betweens, too. Again, communication has always been the key. Sometimes, listening and hearing the tale underneath the reasons reveals a lot of ghastly thoughts regarding misunderstood circumstances that simply needed to be aired. Too often, our defences prevent us from hearing and bringing a relationship closer, and we drive it further apart.

Ironically, creating that safe place to sit and talk, to listen and hear, to discover and build is the very thing we all long for in our heart. To become ALL that we can be, to Be All that we Are: It is to give and receive in such a way that every need is met, and lives are fulfilled. Instead of harbouring uncertainty and ambiguous or nebulous angst, it is given voice to be blown away by the wind of forging a relationship of value. Foundation set, the future rises more powerfully.

From the archives September 29, 2005

The sad clown attracts us and evokes a feeling of sadness and compassion. Have you ever noticed that the sadness and compassion really feels like it is for you? Often we live our suppressed emotional experiences through some other external situation, mainly entertainment. Once we’re in a safe environment, it’s okay to let it out. Except, you’ve buried so many emotions, you’re not sure what is left unexpressed. It can derail you at any time, upsetting your equilibrium, setting the waterworks at the drop of a hat, and blazing the rage with a tiny spark.

Consider a new way of being in this world; a way that allows the expression and understanding of your emotions. Imagine being present for others who are enmeshed in difficult times, barely coping to keep their emotions in check. What healing can occur! What strength will be gained! What friendship and loyalty will be developed! What team support will be developed! What courage will be found!

• If we’re human, then what does it mean to be human?
• If we’re spirit, then what does it mean to be spirit?
• If we’re emotions, then what does it mean to be feelings?
• If we’re the mind, then what does it mean to be thoughts?
• If we’re soul, then what does it mean to be soulful?

I believe we are spiritual beings having a physical, human experience. Within in that context, we experience many things on many levels. Could it be that this is what it means to be a multi-dimensional being? I’m not interested in empirical evidence and succinct clarity; I’m interested in the experience of being and living life. The complexity of existence and the human entity absolutely requires an element of faith and trust in an inner core that cannot be defined by science.

Ups and downs, good days and bad are all part of living life. It won’t always be easy sailing. This doesn’t even take into account that catastrophe’s do happen in people’s lives. I’m simply talking about getting up and going about the same business you usually do, and just thinking and feeling, “Wow, this is a crappy day!” And you know what? It’s okay.

We aren’t always on top of our game. Take a look at any sports team and watch them, or the athletes, go through streaks and spells regularly. What I’ve noticed in the town I live is how hard the fans are on the team when they perform poorly, let alone for any length of time. With all that negative energy, I wonder how much more difficult it is to pull out of the slide?

Let’s face it; when having an off-day, recall the feeling brought on when criticism is aimed your way. Having the off-day, I’m already being tough on myself. That is a thinking problem getting in the way and exposing the wound even more – just waiting for someone to come along and stick a finger in. And when someone says something, the very words I’ve caught myself saying are reinforced and generate more negativity.

The days I’m more consciously together, I weather the bad day better. I ride the waves, my thoughts aren’t running wild, and I don’t let criticism have anything other than a positive effect – should I choose to entertain the criticism in the first place. That’s not running away from anything either, it’s simply recognizing where I’m at and creating the boundaries that respect that. Doing so also offers better opportunities in the future.

Believe me when I tell you, there is nothing worse than yammering at someone when your thoughts and feelings are getting the better of you. What disturbed me this week though, was something I heard from a seniors facility director: “As we get older we lose impulse control.” I didn’t quite know what she meant by that and asked for clarification.

When she interviews candidates wanting to work with seniors they are always asked, “What do you think of old people?” As soon as an answer, “They’re wonderful!” the interview is over. I was surprised to hear this and inquired further to learn that losing impulse control is about the tongue. Working with old people is very demanding and they can be surprisingly mean, with no curbing of the tongue, and no speed bumps to delivery. You have to know this going in, be prepared for it, and to understand where it comes from.

Impulse control… it may be clinically factual with the elderly, and yet something suggests it is equally evident among the general population and is also triggered by prolong periods of high-level stress. I have no fact, nor done any research to support this theory I’ve just stated. I call it a hunch, and looking at my runaway-mouth at times, I wonder. I smile as I say this, because a large part of what I’ve become is about authenticity.

I won’t say I always get it right, and even in that, I’m acknowledging this striving for authenticity. There are going to be days. Right? Being authentic and having intimate relationships are what I hear more people asking and demanding, while feeling an inability to be real. Talking with these like-minded people, it always links to a lot of belief systems that define what has become of our society, business ethic, political and world affairs.

There has been so much progress and striving for improvement, education, advancement, social status, wealth, and so on for generations. With so much focus on the winning, climbing, and achieving, I wonder if it is simply what I hear in the hints people suggest. “There isn’t enough time. I’m always exhausted. I hate my job. People are cold, or unavailable, or too busy.” The list goes on, I’m sure you’ve heard others. Doesn’t it all speak to a simple need to “relate” to one-another, to build intimate relationships, to experience community, and to know and be known?

The other day, I was reading the Meaning of Life wikipedia and found myself also eventually exploring The Hitchhikers Guide to The Galaxy wikipedia page for Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything. This is where the most advanced super-computer churns and churns to come up with the answer. When the answer “42″ is delivered, it leaves more questions than answers. This brings the supercomputer to suggest that they now need to discover the Ultimate Question.

As I read God’s Will and The Meaning of Life a day or so ago, the message again resonated deeply. It is about Love, it is about Joy, and like the people feeling the longing, it is affirmed in their want for intimacy, for authenticity, and in the desire to relate to other human beings. It has me wondering if we’re now at a time, along the journey of mankind, where we can make adjustments for the continued advancement of humankind, society, and see what else good comes from healthy choices.

I’m wondering if isn’t time for us to learn more about being human, beginning with ourselves, and then with others, and adjust culture to embrace our fullness. I found it weird this word fullness forced its’ way in here, and had to reflect on it. The a-ha came almost immediately, recognizing that humanity – you and I – and how we relate will be different. We will create our fullness through these empowering experiences.

I’ve broke promises already made to myself with this blog. I recall one of my earliest posts said I’d post something daily, and that hasn’t happened. Lately, I’ve gotten a bit smarter about it and posted a number on Sunday to self-publish each day of the week. Makes my job just that much easier. However, that doesn’t mean inspiration won’t sneak in and plant a new post mid-week.

Today was a bit of a big day for me. I visited my coach for my own coaching session. I have recognized some things that are problematic for me – particularly when dealing with the opposite sex. At least, that is where it’s most painfully apparent as some needs continue to go unmet: You bet I’m paying attention!

Speaking with her about this particular difficulty, I expressed my frustration at identifying precisely what the problem is that I am having.  What arose surprised me.  She actually used the word ‘Chameleon’ when she began explaining the observation of how I “fit in” wherever I am. She hit a soft spot alright, and not one that I was afraid or embarrassed to face. In fact, I’ve often had a positive relationship with that part of who I am and have been.

This Chameleon is one that had to learn quickly to adapt and merge with new systems of places and people. Moving from birth, from one location to another, one new school to another new school, and from one confrontation to the next as I was challenged repeatedly to show what stuff I was made. Except once, there was no winning – it was automatic defeat by a landslide; a human landslide. How many of us shake our heads in recognition of how cruel we were as kids, often objectifying the behaviour by saying, “Kids are so cruel.” How hard it is to acknowledge what we too have been.

So this skill, unconsciously acquired since early childhood, senses the energy of the environment and people around me. I respond accordingly filling needs of others keeping peace, harmony, and balance. Often I seem the Fool with the show that I put on, all the while a piece of my heart crying out for ‘my turn.’ Such complicated messes our minds and emotions may have become. Adult traumas can trigger and amplify once dead-and-buried issues that have been left unresolved.

First, I must say that this is wholly a good thing. Frightening? Yes! Worth it? Absolutely! This is about becoming. Becoming what? It’s a fair question. You; you are coming who you have always meant to be. Not do.

Look, I’ll tell you something. This hasn’t been easy, and I don’t know what it looks like where I am going. All I do know is that the alternative is hopeless and painful, while the future embattled is hopeful. The irony is, the embattled part will be by my own creation as I deal with my own fears, unresolved and unexpressed emotions, strip away old and useless beliefs, and morph into the true beauty of expression that I’m meant to be.

I’m reminded of the caterpillar becoming a butterfly story I shared with a beautiful young child yesterday. Today, a quick text to a friend stated:

You cannot become what you want until you are ready to give up all that you are.

This significant statement has serious ramifications. Following it is full of land mines. I’ve walked a number of paths trying to determine how best to live and engage myself with life all around me. It’s tricky, it’s hard, and dang-it, it’s lonely with all these thoughts and emotions harassing.

You cannot become what you want until you are ready to give up all that you are.

How many pieces of you will you strip away before discovering what this really means? It took me years of toil. Today, I feel that I’m actually starting to do it – daily – even though I still wrestle with my mind and emotions. And like another text to a dear, dear client:

Trust, Faith, and Love: Focus upon these when stress bears down. They are sufficient, as are you. You are a good man.

My memory and text messages don’t give you enough to ramble like I do with my blog. Sometimes though, not enough often is more.

I’ve broke promises already made to myself with this blog. I recall one of my earliest posts said I’d post something daily, and that hasn’t happened. Lately, I’ve gotten a bit smarter about it and posted a number on Sunday to self-publish each day of the week. Makes my job just that much easier. However, that doesn’t mean inspiration won’t sneak in and plant a new post mid-week.

Today was a bit of a big day for me. I visited my coach for my own coaching session. I have recognized some things that are problematic for me – particularly when dealing with the opposite sex. At least, that is where it’s most painfully apparent as some needs continue to go unmet: You bet I’m paying attention!

Speaking with her about this particular difficulty, I expressed my frustration at identifying precisely what the problem is that I am having.  What arose surprised me.  She actually used the word ‘Chameleon’ when she began explaining the observation of how I “fit in” wherever I am. She hit a soft spot alright, and not one that I was afraid or embarrassed to face. In fact, I’ve often had a positive relationship with that part of who I am and have been.

This Chameleon is one that had to learn quickly to adapt and merge with new systems of places and people. Moving from birth, from one location to another, one new school to another new school, and from one confrontation to the next as I was challenged repeatedly to show what stuff I was made. Except once, there was no winning – it was automatic defeat by a landslide; a human landslide. How many of us shake our heads in recognition of how cruel we were as kids, often objectifying the behaviour by saying, “Kids are so cruel.” How hard it is to acknowledge what we too have been.

So this skill, unconsciously acquired since early childhood, senses the energy of the environment and people around me. I respond accordingly filling needs of others keeping peace, harmony, and balance. Often I seem the Fool with the show that I put on, all the while a piece of my heart crying out for ‘my turn.’ Such complicated messes our minds and emotions may have become. Adult traumas can trigger and amplify once dead-and-buried issues that have been left unresolved.

First, I must say that this is wholly a good thing. Frightening? Yes! Worth it? Absolutely! This is about becoming. Becoming what? It’s a fair question. You; you are coming who you have always meant to be. Not do.

Look, I’ll tell you something. This hasn’t been easy, and I don’t know what it looks like where I am going. All I do know is that the alternative is hopeless and painful, while the future embattled is hopeful. The irony is, the embattled part will be by my own creation as I deal with my own fears, unresolved and unexpressed emotions, strip away old and useless beliefs, and morph into the true beauty of expression that I’m meant to be.

I’m reminded of the caterpillar becoming a butterfly story I shared with a beautiful young child yesterday. Today, a quick text to a friend stated:

You cannot become what you want until you are ready to give up all that you are.

This significant statement has serious ramifications. Following it is full of land mines. I’ve walked a number of paths trying to determine how best to live and engage myself with life all around me. It’s tricky, it’s hard, and dang-it, it’s lonely with all these thoughts and emotions harassing.

You cannot become what you want until you are ready to give up all that you are.

How many pieces of you will you strip away before discovering what this really means? It took me years of toil. Today, I feel that I’m actually starting to do it – daily – even though I still wrestle with my mind and emotions. And like another text to a dear, dear client:

Trust, Faith, and Love: Focus upon these when stress bears down. They are sufficient, as are you. You are a good man.

My memory and text messages don’t give you enough to ramble like I do with my blog. Sometimes though, not enough often is more.